The rock in the river—
Saturday January 24, 2009
—which I could feel rolling beneath me a pulse like a heartbeat the earthsblood warm and sluggish rich just beneath the skin of the earth the rock a skin a skim under my feet flexing welcoming my weight the water sluicing away around me sizzling almost I hear it where it brushes the rock hot not from the sun but itself smiling I can hear it to see me as I sit and gasp feeling already dizzy with anticipation the first time I did this the shock and surprise but now oh now I just want I want the weight of it under me gravity suspended clinging my thighs and my cunt as the rock and the rock against me within me the slick of it clayey like wet skin the pebbles smooth in my fingers as I try to give back with my fingers what little I can until trembling I’m coming so huge and vast and I close my eyes and groan and it’s shaking beneath me the river is roiling the rapids crash and fall about me the land itself changing around me as I dig my hand into the bloodied rock knuckles stinging my calf cramping tears running down my face and I’m screaming and screaming as the wind cracks and the rock shakes and I’m coming it’s coming I’m done and I’m done oh my God I’m done